Friday, December 18, 2015

About love, hope and tears

We were so many
We were  heterogeneous
However, at that time, some of us begun to dream about growing up
That dreams were so sparkling and pretty challenging 
But now
We should end up of this wild dreams
And let it pass away
And dreams are not more than utopia
18/12/15

About some hours ago, my older brother (not literally the older brother) made a call with me. First, he asked me about when would I go home for my Christmas long holiday this year? Then, we begun  To have a long discussion about IDAM*N. IDAM*N was the nick name of Ikat*n Mud-mudi M*nukan. That’s kind of young organization in the village where I was born and grew up, so I could be what I’m being in this time.

Ya, with him, my older brother I was so often talked and dreamed  about many things. One of the dreams we shared is about IDAM*N—that’s making IDAM*N being a home. Home means, a place that people can found, met and had their family. It was where people got loves and had hopes. That was place where people grew up and found out the path of life.

In short, i heard that IDAM*N should took a rest for a while. We faced some hard big things--that i could not told it here. We begun less confidence and felt that our shoulder could not bear the burden that getting heavier anymore.
I just
Just
I was not okay
I was so sad so bad, that was some of us and I have to burry our unfulfilled dreams. Dreams that just got blossom at its best about some years ago.
For me, IDAM*N is just like my second home. 
That’s too fast to give up now. Still, I want to live the dreams about IDAM*N. 
I just feel not good to hear that we have to break for a while just because our feet can’t be stronger anymore to keep stepping in the storm. 
This picture was taken at Friday, August 21th 2015. This picture was my last picture with them before I off to Jakarta. I do remember, the weather at that night was very cold, but we cooked and ate together outside the house. We (merely I) called it as farewell for me who will go out from my hometown and my older brother who will get married. I wish this wasn’t the last picture of us and there will be so many pictures of us ever after.







Friday, December 11, 2015

Holla!

Holla, it’s been a long time. It takes a long time, then now i can write and give kind of greeting again. Hurrah! Hmmm, it’s about one year my very last post here—at that time I was still an innocent student at university *theehee*

Time flies superfast, the wind changes and people grow, so how’s life? Everything goes well, doesn’t it? Yes it does, when you says so.

Do you know what? It’s my very first post on 2015!

So, after having a hard bloody time with my thesis, finally I officially got my bachelor of economics. Alhamdulillah, just because of Allah disposed it and my parent and my sister that never stop praying it for me, finally I can say,” finally I graduated!” I was feeling so happy and blessed, but then I saw myself wasn’t a student anymore and didn’t know what the best thing I have to do ( I meant that although I helped my sister and brother for running her and his business on IT, I still didn’t find my passion yet). At that same time (even til this time) i didn’t know what I will do, either working or back to university again. Then some months later I decided to be a research assistance of my econometrician lecturer, and then being a lecturer assistance of my supervisor thesis.

As time goes, one by one my friends found out the place where they belonging to (a.k.a job, school) while I wasted much of time for thinking, considering and confusing the best thing I will do. Fyuh. One day, my mom told me, ”do what  you have to do as soon as possible, whether you going work or going to university. That would be better not to have marriage at the late period of your age.” Oh, noooooooo. “So, this is the time,” I said to myself and I decided a thing.

In short, I currently stay in a capital city, surrounded by great friends, very dynamic people (society), high and huge building and super busy streets. I am working (oh I think learning is the more precise term to describe what I’m doing now) in a government institute. The place that makes me in loved in the very early time, that is in my first day--when I know  that some people there is having Dhuha time. I sit in the unique room where the people are genius, ambitious, warm hearted, funny and sometimes are naughty.  (-_-“). I wouldn’t say to them that I feel so blessed for having chance to meet and to be with them. 

Btw, here is one of their work, inspired by me—just because I’m single. Pfff. However, I’ll take it as a compliment or kind of attention. People have their own way to show their love, aren’t they? :p